Leadership, Grace and the Courage to Stand Together: Reflections on the Helen Edison Lecture with Ambassador Jeff Flake

Last week, UC San Diego Extended Studies partnered with the Helen Edison Lecture Series to welcome Ambassador Jeff Flake for a conversation with radio host Marco Werman. Their aim was to discuss leadership, democracy, and civic responsibility. What unfolded was far more human than political.

Yes, valuable insights were drawn from decades of experience in Congress and diplomacy. Yes, lessons were shared about trust, restraint, and bipartisan cooperation. But there were also hermit crabs: one hundred and twenty-six of them, to be exact.

In one of the evening's most memorable moments, Flake recounted a self-described “questionable midlife decision” to maroon himself alone on a deserted island. He survived on speared fish that he caught while evading hungry sharks and found himself numbering his hermit crab companions with a Sharpie pen–not out of scientific rigor, but from sheer loneliness.

The point landed gently but unmistakably: independence is overrated. Whether on a deserted island or in a democracy, humans are not built to thrive alone.

Throughout the talk, Flake returned to a simple but radical idea. Leadership in a democracy is not about dominance or performance; it is about serving the greater good. It is about choosing decency when humiliation is easier, telling your “own side” the truth even when it costs you, and building trust slowly through conduct rather than rhetoric.

There was humor, including the witty observation that Republicans and Democrats can, in fact, get along "if death is the only option,” a conclusion resulting from a follow-up trip to a different deserted island with a fellow Democratic congressman. There was also deep moral clarity, especially in Flake's stories about acts of kindness and grace, which served as reminders not to judge people by their worst day and to choose compassion over contempt.

As one who helps shepherd the Helen Edison Lecture Series, I find evenings like this an affirmation of why thoughtful, public conversations are so important. In an era when outrage is rewarded, and certainty is currency, creating public spaces for reflection, humility, and shared humanity is not a luxury; it is civic work.

In the holiday season of care and giving, this talk presented an invitation to pause, listen more generously, and tend to the fragile bonds that hold civic life together with deliberate care.

If you weren’t able to join us in person, I encourage you to watch the full lecture on YouTube.
 

Engaging with and sharing conversations like the one with Ambassador Flake and Marco Werman is a meaningful way to strengthen civic understanding and connection. Democracy endures not because it is guaranteed, but because people choose to tend it.

If you feel moved, supporting the Helen Edison Lecture Series directly through Endowment Fund K1296 is a meaningful way to ensure that thoughtful public dialogue continues. You can make a gift online at giveto.ucsd.edu.

Thank you for your patronage–and happy holidays!